Category Archives: journey

on reading between the lines

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I’ve Fallen into the blog hopping mode these past few days. I’ve encountered a few entries, where the author has posted a one liner, a quote, a question, a picture, or a random thought. For A regular Guy, he would probably be puzzled, misunderstood, curious, or even indifferent. For the one who knows the author more deeply, or can read between the lines, then the post can be an expression of truth, a hidden meaning, or a revelation that they secretly want to shout to the world but cannot because of various consequences.
Who Is it that created a blog account anyway, when privacy was still important. Wasn’t it ourselves, anyway, who chooses to hide behind a facade? We all know that blogging has Taken over the dear diary days where you can pour your heart and soul into a private black book. How funny it is that people will resort to secret codes, anonymity, pseudo language, when the truth of matter is, it is such a relief to post truths such as “it wasn’t meant to be”, “It’s Breaking My Heart”, “he doesn’t love me anymore”, “i’m pregnant”, “i regret what i did”, “i slept with my boyfriend’s best friend”, “it was me” as a form of release.
Maybe the answer should be having courage to speak up, to be heard, to risk being judged. Just so that you can get it out of your system. As they say, “Let Go, Let God”.

I’m ready now

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Monday has definitely been one of my not better days. To think that the week just started. Yesterday morning, Monday’s stress caught up with me. My stomach took the bunt and I forced myself to stay home (so, okay, I didn’t have to force hard. I could have still gone to work, but I didn’t want to). For most of the day I worked from home, using my ever reliable broadband (I’m being sarcastic, connection has been hell) and mobile landline. Since my stomach didn’t feel like eating, I was only ready to go out for food by dinnertime.


And then Oman happened.

Oman is a guy I haven’t seen or heard from in ages. And I mean ages. A vivid memory would be playing patintero or office-officean during baby-days in old Pilar, before we left for Dubai in ’85. After that, it was snippets here and there of when we saw each other. Oman was an old neighbor, childhood friend and playmate. Mostly my brother and sister at least, since he fell under their age group. A couple of years after our family moved to Dubai, his family moved to Australia. So the chances of us running into each other were quite slim.

Our families are still in touch, apparently, so when he and his family visited my parents in Canada, he told them that he will be visiting Pinas and staying in BF Resort (where I also stay). My mom, I’m assuming it’s my mom, gave him my number and yesterday, of all days, he messaged to say he was in town. After a few exchange, we ended up having dinner for good Filipino food and major catching up.

Oman had loads of stories to tell. About life in Aussie, his business ventures, his family, his latest round-the-world trip, his search for a future bride, his jampacked schedule for the next few days, his goals, his questions in life, his heart ache, etc. etc. etc. It was indeed an interesting 3 and a half hour to spend.

In the course of the conversation, I discovered and learned a few things.

  • That there are still idealists out there;
  • Being gutsy takes over smarts, in any place of the world;
  • Security won’t necessarily come from a monthly pay check;
  • Responsibility rules – without it, it’s like throwing away your hard earned cash;
  • You don’t necessarily need titles, degrees, or experience to be paid $100 an hour;
  • Nor do you necessarily need capital to start a business;
  • Ingenuity is the name of the game;
  • That starting at the bottom of the pyramid is not necessarily a bad thing;
  • That losing money, should never be a reason to be disheartened – it’s just money, and it can be earned again;
  • That being afraid can literally stop you from being the best you can be;
  • That there are still guys out there who are looking for the “true pinay” (and what he meant by that is the “never been kissed, never been touched” pinay);
  • Change is not a bad thing; in fact if you get over being afraid, change is most definitely a good thing;
  • That I already knew about change being a good thing (in principle) but I have never really gone out of my shell because of fear.

After a series of misfortunate events, and I badly needed a good pick me up (or a slap in the face), I came to realize that my night with Oman came in perfect timing.

My fears got challenged,
my opinions started looking at different perspectives,
and his Just Do It attitude rubbed a little on me.

I’m ready now to take control of my life once again. And if I play my cards right, I think events should be onward and upward from here. But not without being challenged first. I anticipate that, I look forward to it. It’s even funny that the day Oman leaves Pinas is when one of my challenges will come. That wasn’t a coincidence either. That was the universe giving me a clear answer to my question.


(a picture of me, Oman and Ivan –> Ivan a guy also from Pilar)

COMMITMENT NGA

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Right after posting my last post, i viewed the blog, and right beneath it was my my battlecry…. COMMITMENT nga naman and not CIRCUMSTANCES will dictate the outcome.

So, with much kulit and bola from my part, I got landlord to move deadline to tomorrow morning. She said, sige kahit lunch time tomorrow. I think I can breathe now.

i hate last minute

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I did my part, I know I did. I gave them enough time. I emailed them hours ago. But 8 minutes and 10 seconds before the deadline, I called them to say malapit na deadline mo, and nasan na yung pirma mo. (Pirma lang hintay ko, ako na gumawa lahat ng paperwork) Biglang nag nego ba naman sa terms and conditions?! Argh! Ano ba yun! You could have done that even an hour ago! Would have saved us a lot of time and trouble. Now the landlord is saying, I can’t wait for you anymore. It’s 5 mins after 5pm. I gave you the deadline, now I have to decline your offer. Huwaw!

It doesn’t matter if the fault is hers or mine. At the end of the day, client is going to say “ah, she’s not good enough to get me the space”; and the landlord is going to say, “she just made us wait for nothing”.

I not only hate being stressed at the last minute; I also hate being the middleman.

My week that was

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  • My weekday - Work, work, a wedding to break the cycle, work… and did I say work?
  • My weekend - Slow; lotsa sleep, games and chat
  • My # 1 Win - Getting confirmation that I—- has approved budget, and will sign with me next week! Yehey!
  • My “I Wish I” - did my breakthrough with my boss (which I’ve been postponing for, I think, a month now)
  • Most exciting happening - Coordinated wedding last Tuesday. :) It was fun, although my feet hurt like hell halfway through.
  • Most frustrating feeling - When I found out that I lost money, again, this week, and again not knowing how?!
  • Lesson of the week - “You keep getting the same problem because you haven’t learnt your lesson” I hope my next week’s lesson is more fruitful.
  • Newest addiction - Blogging. :D
  • (Pleasant) Surprise - Bride wasn’t a bridezilla after all.
  • (Shocking) Surprise - my latest Meralco bill
  • Person who irked me the most - Myself, unfortunately, because I felt so irres for losing money. :(
  • Person who inspired me to be better - my colleague Mina, who closed a couple of sales this week. Galing galing. Oh and Kris pala, for being the “master” in ceremony coordinator. One of the few times when the entourage line up went as we expected.
  • Person who had me thinking - Karen asking me, “so have you moved since we last talked?”
  • Person I missed the most - strangely missed Joco; kse naman, medyo nagiging regular ka chat si Jing and Danna… si Joco lang wala.
  • Reward for the week - Eat (?)
  • To complete my weekend, I should - do my chores (clean house, bring clothes to laundry, have car washed)
  • My first “to do” next week - Write down my list of TO DO’s and DO THEM. :)